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[bakegarasu]

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[bakegarasu]

[He chuckles and knocks his glass into hers gently before taking a sip.]

Tell me something you like about yourself.

[He's already trying to think of something for himself, but her first.]

[heavensnight]

[that's a good question. Maria doesn't think she would be able to tell someone even one trait about herself.

she is silent for probably too long before she decides on:] I think that I like to try to help. I do what I can?

[it was better than doing morning.]

What about you?

[bakegarasu]

[He was thinking of something similar, but -]

... I like that I'm persistent. If I set a goal I finish it.

[Unless circumstances prevent him from doing so, but he does his best at least.]

Were you a shy kid growing up or no?

[heavensnight]

[part of Maria knows she could come up with a story but something about lying to Otoha doesn't feel right.]

I can't say I ever think much about my childhood. [she didn't have one.] You think I seem like someone that was a shy kid?

[bakegarasu]

I dunno. I was pretty shy until I hit my growth spurt. Then I started to hang around with the older kids in my group and got cocky. Started acting out... I grew out of being such a little jackass after I left school.

Kids change. They're a lot different than who we are as adults.

[heavensnight]

[Maria raises an eyebrow.]

You cocky?

[bakegarasu]

What, you've never run into a smarmy-ass teenager? I thought that I could take on the world, as long as my brother wasn't around. If he was it was 'yes sir, no sir'. If I was too much of a little shit he would send me to train with the guys who were bigger than me and they'd knock the sass out of me for a bit.

[heavensnight]

Oh, I know teenagers can be little assholes. But I never saw you as the type to be cocky. I would have loved to see it.

[bakegarasu]

Nah, you wouldn't. I would've called you shit that you didn't deserve to be called because I thought that's how you treated women.

[Like even if someone's promiscuous and sleeps around it's still rude to call attention to it.]

[heavensnight]

I'm a stripper, Otoha. Like men haven't called me worse.

[or that she hadn't been treated worse.]

A little punk is just a little punk.

[bakegarasu]

Just because you have doesn't mean you deserve it. You think I deserved what everyone called me?

[Not that he cared. ... He did, a little bit. But not enough to show it.]

[heavensnight]

Of course I don't.

But some behaviors and stuff like that come with the job. [she shrugs and takes a sip.]

Being called shit is part of mine. That's all.

[bakegarasu]

[He frowns, trying to think of a comeback - she's right, but he doesn't like it.]

Well, if anyone calls you that stuff here I'm beating their ass. Just so you know.

[heavensnight]

[she smirks at him and nudges him with her elbow.]

Protecting my honor?

[bakegarasu]

If you're not gonna, I will.

[He sips at his drink again. He's not going to let her put herself down.]

... I just want you to be happy. You're... a great person, even if it's hard for you to believe. At least here, in this place... we can have some peace.

[heavensnight]

[she laughs and then shakes her head.]

I'm not laughing at you. But you're saying how I've felt. I know bad things happen here but this place feels like a chance to me. I don't think anybody else feels the same way.

But I'm going to do the same thing for you. I think you deserve good things.

[bakegarasu]

... We look out for each other, then. That's what a good partnership is like, yeah?

[He tries to push the memory of Reiji away, but the flicker of sadness appears on his face for a moment. He takes a big drink to push his feelings away.]

It's funny... I never thought I'd be in a situation like this. Just... sitting with someone like you. Not being on guard duty - not even having to worry so much about anyone attacking, even.

[heavensnight]

[Maria noticed things. it was the only thing she could do because one small detail could change everything for her. she'd learned to study James so well she learned every flicker of any emotion that could be read on his face.

this extended itself to Otoha. simply she found she could understand people well. Maria doesn't know what is the root cause of the sadness but she worries nonetheless.]

A partnership, then. Or I guess that's what they call a friendship? But if we're starting this off right then tell me, what's on your mind? Just how new this all is?

[bakegarasu]

...

[He sighs and just shakes his head.]

Thought about Reiji for a moment. I didn't... want to make you worry.

[heavensnight]

Well, don't worry about me. You can talk about him if you like. I don't mind.

[she wanted to help anyway.]

[bakegarasu]

... I mean... I just realized recently that I had a crush on him. Something I should have known earlier but I was... you know. The people I hung out with didn't really... look well on guys like guys like that. I just... miss having my partner in crime.

[Literal crime, but whatever.]

Kinda bad form to talk about an ex on a date though, from what I know.

[heavensnight]

[Maria puts her elbows on the bar and her finger goes around the rim of her glass.]

It's our date. We can say what goes. Talk about what we want. [she gives him a sympathetic smile.]

I'm sorry you didn't get to understand your feelings until recently. Do you think you would have acted on it? If you could have?

[bakegarasu]

... I don't think so. It wasn't exactly a place where you could be open about your feelings. Especially... those kinds of feelings towards other men.

[He looks away - he'd never cared about that stuff, but the other guys seemed to.]

It wasn't the best environment for... a lot of feelings. Or people. Or life in general.

[heavensnight]

[Maria lets the words sink in and she does realize that it being another man does complicate things.]

And you just realized all of this now, huh? Your feelings. I'm sorry. I'm sorry they weren't something you could act on.

[bakegarasu]

Recently, yeah. I don't... know where he is now, if anywhere, but I hope he's happy.

[Sure, reincarnation's a neat idea and he knows yokai exist now, but the certainties of what happens after death? No idea.]

[He looks down at his hands and taps his fingers against the table, almost nervously.]

I just... feelings are complicated. When I was little it was best to pretend I didn't have any at all. When I was a teen it was mostly anger. As an adult it was mostly murderous glee if anything. ... But now I'm free to have whatever emotions I want.